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Porn St*rs, Scratch and Sniff and Balls from Outer Space

Monday 13 June 2016

Happy Monday everyone. After this weekend’s events, there are a few questions which need answering, so let’s take a look




        1)   Why is Harry Kane taking corners?

Whilst I toyed with the idea of Roy Hodgson having a personal vendetta against me due to me having a Harry Kane to score anytime wager against Russia, I think it’s fair to say that the whole of the country is completely perplexed as to why Tottenham’s main marksman is on corner taking duties

A quick perusal of the stats for the season shows that Kane has not had one assist from a corner throughout the whole season. In fact, he doesn’t even take them for Spurs, it’s mainly Christian Eriksen.


Apparently, it’s because he can “strike the ball well” which to me translates to “he can kick a ball”. Not sure why Messrs Alli, Rooney, Lallana would not be able to do exactly the same and give England the chance of having the opportunity to be in the box to actually stick it in the net.

For me it's a bit like being a famous porn star and instead of being asked to be the main star to instead step behind the camera and direct the movie. Hardly the smartest idea in the world. Come on Woy, sort it out!

2      2)   What was Joachim Low smelling?

There is a lot about to admire about the Germans, be it there ability to always get a result, their mental strength or also Joachim Low's wonderful head of hair. However, on thing I am not sure about is his personal hygiene. What exactly was going on here?  Some bizarre real life version of Scratch and Sniff?

Not content with one effort, the German manager went for another. Thankfully for everyone else, he did not go on to complete an unwanted hat trick!





Closer inspection reveals that Low actually does have previous on this.  Just ask Cristiano Ronaldo!



3) Where did Modric's ball come from?

Luka Modric spanked in a wonderful goal on the weekend with the ball appearing to drop from miles in the sky before being laced beautifully into the bottom corner. A few people have asked where the ball had dropped from, with some quoted as saying it had dropped in from outer space.  

However, the correct answer is that the ball had finally returned from this famous penalty miss from Chris Waddle in Italia 90. If you watch the videos straight after each other then you will see it all makes sense...honest





Sunil

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